Missing pieces
by fangirlandiknowit
Summary: No matter how painful, it's better to know the truth, right? As Gaara wants to dig up the past Itachi tries to protect what he can, and in the middle of it all is Naruto and Sasuke. With broken families and questionable morals, it's time to find those missing pieces. Crime, drama, romance. Rated M, mainly yaoi! Parallel to Results of a shitty day, but can be read on its own.
1. I know it started here

Hello everyone! I'm so excited please bear with me... heh... Anyway here it is! The parallel story to Results of a shitty day! Which means, you can read it on its own I think, since all will be explained here too.

There are a few important things we need to go through before you start reading this (awesome) story. First of all, the main pairing is ItachixGaara, but for a big part of the story, that's mainly friendship based. There are reasons. Well. There is also NarutoxSasuke, but since Results of a shitty day focuses on their relationship it'll be in the sidelines here. Oh, and ItaGaa is not because of the pairing but because of things that happened in Results that forced me into re-thinking a lot of things and also write this story!

Secondly, there is both yaoi and hetero and who knows there might be shoujo-ai as well. If you hate het pairings more than anything regardless of plot importance, then I'm sorry you might not enjoy a few of these chapters. No het sex scenes though, I'm not so much into that.

Thirdly, the main part of this story is PLOT. Which means yes, romance is an important part of the plot but that's not the main objective here. For those who have read Results (will anyone dare to try it without reading Results first? I hope so) then you can think of it as this story will give you the missing pieces from there. And there are many, many of those. (Bad joke with the title I'm sorry as always)

This will be a long story. Very long. Yay. Which means slow progress and character development because I like those things. I'll try to write as often as I can but Uni is stealing a lot of time, not to mention I supposedly have a life as well. A lot of scenes in here will be in the past, not in flashback format but as a parallell to the main storyline. The amount varies from chapter to chapter. Therefore, pay attention to the years written! (Also, Results of a shitty day would have started in October 2012, but you'll get those dates later as well).

I don't want to explain too much and make this AN unnecessarily long, so just believe that everything is written for a reason (I'm doing some major plot preparation for this one) and if you have any questions feel free to ask them in a review or PM and I'll answer you:) Oh, and no characters are OC's unless I go out of my way to say so.

Disclaimer: Nope I don't own Naruto's glorious ass.

**Warnings:** This is labeled crime, in which is included some maybe graphic scenes. Depends on your view of graphic. Anyway, expect this story to contain painful things as well as nice ones. What is NOT included is heavy angst, self-harm, main character death, rape. This is an adult story. I have no illusions that younger people won't read this (that would be half my fan-base) so don't come complaining to me if you think something hurts your kokoro (I know it hurts mine). I am sorry though. This isn't like the usual things I write.

Approved of by my lovely girlfriend adgxvnetu before publishing;)

Alright let's do this!

* * *

**Missing pieces**

**Chapter one: I know it started here**

xxx

**-January 3rd 1991-**

"Hey Gaara! Are you gonna come play with us today?"

He glanced at the smaller girl excitedly skipping along next to him, trying to keep up with his fast pace.

"Leave me alone" he muttered in a toneless voice, wondering why she insisted on asking him to join in.

He knew there weren't any others that wanted him there. Starting a higher grade last semester he'd had to change schools, and in the beginning a few girls that didn't know him had giggled and tried to talk with him, but soon lost interest when he ignored them. It's not that he didn't want friends, it just wasn't possible.

And so, he shook his head as a final answer, pushed his hands deeper down the pockets of his too thin winter coat and hurried on. Every time he left home he liked to think he was going somewhere, when in reality he usually just took the same walk around the neighborhood lake. Shoulders tense against the cold he tried to ignore how his ears burned as he made his way along the icy walkway next to it, the wind chilly this morning and the slope up towards the car road not hindering it in the least. Not many others were out, just a few grown-ups walking their dogs.

He tried to think of nothing, feel nothing, avoiding eye contact whenever he passed someone. Not that many seemed interested in a twelve-year-old kid like him. He balled his hands into fists, glaring at the ground. It would be nice if he wouldn't have to walk alone all the time. With a sigh he kicked at the ground, a frozen piece of snow sliding over frozen ground, getting caught on the pebbles strewn out and coming to a stop earlier than he liked. He wished he could kick everything far, far away.

Barely a few seconds after that, right after he'd thought of the calm morning with resentment, a loud crash was heard. Metal against metal, and Gaara would never forget that sound of it buckling under its own weight. His head snapped up just in time to catch the sleek silver car tumbling over the safety railing, flying as if weightless through the air, silence prickling in his ears despite the sounds of engines still coming from up the road.

He clenched his eyes shut, hands pressed over his ears but not in time to miss the sight as it landed on its left side, the crash it made softened by deep snow, the shattering of tinted glass. On autopilot he'd curled into a ball, as if scared the car would hit him seeing how close he was. Even with his ears covered he could hear when silence and stillness turned into gasps and scared shouts and confusion, and just as he was about to squint through his lashes, the unmistakable wail of a baby rang through the air.

Raising his head his eyes opened wide, and for the rest of his life he'd wish he hadn't looked. The car had come to a stop in the small ditch between the walkway and the slope, somewhere along the way it had turned to lie upside down and when the few people already there parted to the sides, he saw them.

The left side of the car was halfway smashed inwards; it must have landed on one of the rocks protruding out of the hillside. From his bent position he could see straight into the front seats, to the right was squeezed between metal and seatbelt what looked to be a man, streaks of blood running down his forehead and continuing into his blond hair.

Gaara wanted to puke.

His brain wouldn't let him though, and his eyes slowly moved to the middle, where arms and long red hair lay tangled in a mess he quickly darted away from, and to the left was where the wails came from, all he could see were tiny legs kicking back and forth.

A sense of relief washed over him at once, and he stared, stared hard, as people tried in vain to open the door, giving up and trying to get the baby out through the window instead. He hadn't noticed there were tears streaming down his face until a hand landed on his shoulder, and an elderly woman gave him a sad smile.

"Sweetie, I think it's better if you went home. Children shouldn't see things like this."

He sniveled, dried his nose on his sleeve and the tears as well when he felt his cheeks freeze in the wind. Nodding he left, glancing back at the wreckage once. Then he turned and ran, ran as fast as he could, slipping several times but not caring, his chest a deep black hole and when he couldn't run anymore, couldn't breathe, he stopped and clung gasping to a streetlight. The baby… Oh god the baby! It was all alone now, no mother, no father, no one to hold it and love it. All alone just like Gaara…

Clenching his mouth shut until his jaw hurt he forced himself to stop crying, fingers stiff and cold as they rubbed his cheeks. Hiccupping despite his efforts he tried to talk some sense into himself, like he always did when his emotions took control of him. He wasn't completely alone. His dad was still alive, though it was questionable how much good that did for anyone. His sister was still living with them, even after threatening to leave so many times, just like his brother had already done. He wasn't alone. He just had to be good and stay with them.

Unable to stop another sob shaking his chest he felt the pain of a hundred secret wishes running through him. He slid down to his knees, not noticing how cold the snow was and how hard the ground underneath felt. He wanted to leave. He wanted his sister to leave and take him with her, but he knew it wouldn't happen. He was just a burden. Just a painful reminder that their mother was gone, wasn't coming back.

He didn't know how he made it home, only knew he was cold and hungry and miserable. Except apparently it wasn't home anymore, judging by the social worker standing with a serious face behind his crying sister.

"I'm so sorry Gaara, I just can't live like this anymore."

That day, Gaara's life wasn't the only that changed forever.

**-June 18th 2012-**

"Hey, Gaara! Are you gonna eat with us today or what?"

Frowning, Gaara answered without looking away from his computer screen.

"Mind your own business Yurika, I'm working."

"Yeah, and with what exactly? There aren't any big cases lately, plus you'll starve to death the way you're living right now. I haven't seen you eat in a week!"

Sighing Gaara leaned back in his office chair, giving up on getting rid of her without a decent answer.

"I'm taking the time to work on _that_ case."

She opened her mouth to retort, but then she sighed as well and gave him a pitying look he could have done without.

"I know it's hard for you, but-"

"No" he interrupted her tonelessly, "You don't know at all."

She let out a frustrated noise and walked around his desk. He didn't bother hiding what was on the screen, he knew what she'd say already.

"Uchiha Corporation? Really? You know that's a dead end."

"Says who?"

"Gaara, take a break! You can't save the world on your own, and you need to eat. Everyone is worried about you. I mean, what's going to happen if our boss dies from malnutrition? It would bring shame on us all."

"I already have a lunch date, I'm afraid" he answered, giving her an obviously fake smile, seeing as he rarely ever smiled for real. "Don't worry, I'll be sure to eat."

Turning off his computer he stood up to get ready, ignoring her worried looks. He'd been getting plenty of those the past five years.

"He wouldn't want you to hurt yourself like this" she said, quietly, but the words rang loud in Gaara's ears as he froze.

"It's not like that" he mumbled, defensive now. "Worry about yourself instead, isn't it about time you got yourself a boyfriend?"

"I could say the same about you!" she squeaked back indignantly, but he waved her off as he exited his office, tightening his tie as he nodded at his subordinates, giving a half-asleep Konohamaru a slap over the back of his head as he passed.

"I'm sorry boss!" the younger man shouted after him, and he shook his head slowly to himself.

What he'd done to earn their respect was easy to say, but this never-ending worry and meddling in his private life? He could absolutely do without it.

As he drove out of the parking garage he listened with half a mind to the noise from the police radio, his thoughts drifting to the matter at hand. Oh, he knew the Uchiha lead was a dead end. The question was, why? Why was it such an obvious dead end, like a cliff rising straight up into the air? Twenty years was enough time to get rid of all evidence, and he bit the inside of his cheek in annoyance at a red light. His mentor hadn't thought it was a pointless lead, and now he was dead and Gaara had spent the past five years fruitlessly searching for clues. Baki's death had been described as unfortunate, and their superiors had decided to stop all investigations regarding the Akatsuki case and leave it up to the international police.

Needless to say, Gaara hadn't been satisfied with that. Doing everything alone in his spare time though, it had been slow going, but he finally felt like he had a grip on the case and knew where to go from now. Akatsuki may be a large organization now, but everyone starts somewhere, and Gaara was certain it all started here.

Therefore, first stop: Uchiha Itachi.

xxx

When Gaara was finally allowed onto Itachi's floor he felt ready to shove his badge up the nostrils of the next person telling him to wait. He felt like the respect for the law was just dwindling day by day, and he thanked (and cursed) his lucky star that he was official and important enough to usually get away with some bullying if it hurried up the process of getting him where he wanted. A secretary with a face so calm it looked etched in stone slowly guided him towards the door to the head of Uchiha Corporation's office, and he braced himself as it was opened and the secretary exchanged a few words with the older Uchiha brother.

Gaara wondered what it must be like to be in charge of a company of this magnitude at the mere age of 30, not that Gaara was much older or having any less responsibility. The difference was, he supposed, that he'd earned his position while Itachi's father had simply died and forced the position onto his son. That was about as much as Gaara had been able to find out about Itachi from his research on the family, that and the fact that the man inside the office was supposedly a genius academic.

"He'll see you now" the secretary said, and Gaara entered without an answer.

Once he'd crossed the threshold he sized the other man up, a calm handsome face observing him with deep dark eyes, long equally dark hair slung in a ponytail over a shoulder, a designer cut suit hugging the tall figure snugly as he stood up to greet Gaara. An elegant eyebrow raised, and Gaara knew what kind of impression he must be giving. Bright red hair, fringe barely covering the kanji for love tattooed in brighter red ink thanks to an accident at the hairdresser's, coupled with the don't-fuck-with-me aura Konohamaru had so nicely told him was able to scare the bravest man into cooperation.

Not to mention he was sure his shirt was wrinkly in at least ten places, and had he been more observant of the fact that Itachi was gorgeous as hell he might have done something about it before coming here.

What a shame the Uchiha was already married.

Snatching up his badge from his pocket in a well-practiced move he handed it over for inspection before they shook hands.

"If you don't mind, I have a few things I'd like to talk to you about. We could do it over lunch, if you'd prefer that."

Itachi gave him a calculating look, still standing up behind his desk.

"Perhaps lunch would be better, I'll have my secretary call and make a reservation immediately."

Gaara hardly believed his ears. No objections? He tried to tell his heart to stop beating so hard, he was a professional damn it! But the thought that Itachi might have expected him, did he know something or was he just careful because he didn't know what the police wanted with him?

Well, not that Gaara was technically the police; working at the special division right under the government as he was. If only everyone could be as efficient as Itachi when he dealt with them, but he'd learnt over and over again that people were often more concerned with not angering their superiors than aiding the police.

"All set up" Itachi said, bringing him out of his musings. "Are we taking my car or yours, Mr. Sabaku?"

"Mine, if you don't mind. It's not official so don't worry about that. Also, please call me Gaara, because I'm going to call you Itachi."

If Itachi wanted to protest Gaara didn't notice, he wasn't there on official business and so he wouldn't bother with pleasantries. Instead he just led the way back down to his car, Itachi frowning at having to walk through the lobby in plain sight, but again Gaara ignored him.

"Where to?" Gaara asked once they'd settled into his car.

"The Purple Garden" was the short answer, and Gaara nodded in agreement.

"Good choice" he commented as he started driving, glancing quickly at the other man before concentrating on the road.

"I'll just assume you know where it is, then. So, what have I done to deserve the attention of the," he paused briefly, "'National special forces of crime investigation'?"

Gaara made a grimace.

"Such a flashy name, isn't it. Well, I have to admit they don't want anything with you, I'm here unofficially."

"So is it that they don't want anything, or they can't admit they want something?"

Gaara sent an answering quirk of lips in the direction of Itachi's confident smirk. He was starting to like this guy.

"If it was the latter you shouldn't be so amused about it. It means I'm investigating something in my spare time and it may or may not involve you somehow."

Itachi's smirk instantly fell.

"I see" he mused, leaning his elbow against the car door. "And this 'something', just what exactly is it?"

"I'd rather not talk in the car" Gaara answered, distracted at the end by a voice coming from the radio.

"So-"

"Hush" Gaara interrupted with, raising a hand momentarily to silence Itachi as if the hushing wasn't enough. "That's right next to us, isn't it?" he added a few moments later, nodding towards the radio, eyes narrowing in contemplation.

"You're going to go start chasing after some criminals?" Itachi asked, incredulously and with a slight tone of horror at the end.

Gaara smirked at him, before grabbing a siren from between the seats, turning it on and opening the window to place it on the roof of the car.

"Hold on to something" he advised, as the window closed again to muffle the sound of the siren, and then swerved to the side to smoothly run past a few cars in front of them before making a sharp turn to the left crossing a red light.

Picking up a small speaker device he reported into it, a concentrated frown on his face as he just managed to avoid hitting a few pedestrians. After a few seconds of silence, an upset female voice sounded through the radio.

"_Gaara is that you?! I swear to god if you butt into my business _again _I'll have you reported! What do you think you're doing!"_

"Calm down Yugito, I'm just helping. If you did your job properly I wouldn't need to 'butt into your business'."

A string of curses was heard, causing Gaara to sigh quietly.

"I'm two streets away now shut up and let me drive."

To his side, Itachi looked ready to call a mental hospital.

"Don't worry Itachi, she loves it when I help out. We're old friends."

The Uchiha didn't look convinced, but Gaara didn't have time to worry about it right now. He'd just caught sight of what had to be the getaway car they were looking for. Maneuvering his own car through the now more crowded streets he cursed out loud. He hated this kind of thing, too many innocent people ran the risk of getting hurt. Turning into a side street he sped up, hoping he could get ahead of the other car. It was just a problem that he wasn't alone in the car, and it would probably be a bad idea to get the other man hurt. He sort of needed him on his good side.

"We're level with them now."

Gaara almost made a startled noise at the words coming from Itachi, but nodded and sped up as much as he dared. It wasn't nearly as fast as on TV, sadly.

"Two streets up there's a dead end, I was thinking I could force them in there" he answered, unsure of why he shared his plan but thinking it didn't hurt.

Slowing in to round a corner he went back to the previous street, lucky enough to have come out on top, and with a moment of fear that the other car would run straight into them he breathed out as they swerved into the side street to avoid him.

"Got them" he gritted out through clenched teeth and drove after the other car into the small street lined with parked cars on both sides.

The other car had stopped at the dead end, metal bars cutting off the street from the next one, and apparently they abandoned their attempts to turn around when they noticed the siren following them. Instead two men jumped out just as Gaara screeched to a stop a few meters away, flinging the door open and yelling at them to stop or get shot.

His answer were a few bullets to the front window, and with a curse he ducked behind the door and gave Itachi a sour look.

"Of course they had to have guns" he muttered, leaning inside again to grab the speaker, ignoring Itachi's pale face staring at the impact of the bullets on the bullet-proof window.

"They're heading on foot along Oak street, with guns. You better call for some heavier back-up, Yugito."

"_I thought _you_ were the heavier back-up!" _

"I didn't bring my gun" Gaara muttered, angry with himself.

"_Come again?" _

"I said I didn't bring my gun! I'm out for lunch!"

There was silence for a few seconds, and Gaara was glad he didn't have to listen to her cursing him out.

"Hey, you should be happy I stopped them from running over some poor old lady at least. Do you want me to check the car?"

"_Just stay where you are, I'll be there in a sec. The helicopter has spotted them so don't bite your nails off over it."_

With a sigh Gaara sank down into his seat, tossing the speaker away.

"Sorry about that" he offered, a little peeved about the fact that now he had to fix his car, and get yelled at by so many people his head was already hurting.

"You know," Itachi started, unclenching his fingers from the side of the car, "I was thinking that today was rather boring, but I'm not sure getting shot at is what I was aiming for."

Gaara chuckled tiredly, rubbing the side of his face.

"The one day I bring a passenger and no gun. I don't think I want to know what you think of me right now."

"Hmm, well, if you kidnapped me to take me on a date, I'd have to admit I'm a little bit impressed. You look like a gangster though, driving like that."

Gaara tried really hard not to let his cheeks heat up. How long had it been since he blushed anyway?

"Oh god" he groaned. "If only criminals weren't so bad at aiming." Surprisingly, Itachi actually laughed at that, and Gaara felt his shoulders lose some tension. "But I have a good reason to call you out like this, I swear. Well, minus the car chase."

"Alright, I'll believe you for now."

Gaara nodded, more relieved than he should be, brushing his fingers nervously through his fringe as they waited for Yugito to show up. He tried to ignore the looks from the few people passing by, thankful for the tinted windows. He felt like lately, his life had been one big mess and he wasn't sure why that was. If anything, his life nowadays was a lot better than when he was younger.

"I can't believe the fucking nerve you've got!" a tall woman with blond hair tied into a long braid growled as she flung the door open.

"Hello to you too, Yugito" he sighed, eyes closing for a moment.

"Eh? What's this, you've got a passenger?" She peeked into the car, eyes widening as she saw Itachi. "I don't know what you said to make him agree on a date with you, but maybe doing this kind of thing is the reason you're still painfully single."

"Oh get lost" he snapped, turning the key to start the engine. "If all you're going to do is yell at me I think I'll just leave now. There's the car, have fun."

"If you break his heart I will kill you~" she managed to sing at Itachi before Gaara slammed the door shut, cursing as he realized getting out of there was going to be difficult.

"Well, she seemed nice" Itachi commented as they were finally back on the road, an amused smile playing over his lips.

Gaara sent him a look but didn't comment, too busy trying to drive the car with a cracked-up windshield blocking his view. He'd turned off the radio to avoid any additional tempting car chases, and the sound of the AC buzzing grated on his nerves. The unexpected action earlier had managed to distract him from the task at hand, but now it was all creeping back to him, a different kind of tension tagging along with it. Itachi felt like a deal-breaker. It was do or die now, not literally perhaps but if this didn't lead him anywhere, he would have to go home and re-evaluate his life, and that wasn't something he looked forward to.

"We're here" he sighed, finally, as he pulled the car into the parking lot behind the restaurant. They were lucky to find a spot during the lunch rush.

Just as he stretched out to open the door Itachi's hand landed on his arm, and he turned to give him a questioning look. The other man seemed ready to say something, but then changed his mind and shook his head. Slowly, Gaara let out the breath he'd held, and got out of the car. He tried to look nonchalant as people stared worriedly at the bullet marks, hoping he wouldn't get in trouble with the Uchiha for the unwanted attention.

"Well, this is one way to make an impression" Itachi noted, in an attempt at breaking the seriousness of the situation.

Gaara shrugged, unable to relax at the moment. Too soon they'd been shown inside, getting a table on the second floor. The Purple Garden was known for its private, quiet atmosphere, the kind of place you take business associates or dates. He wondered which category people thought they fell under, wishing either of them were true.

"So" Itachi started, after they'd placed their orders, hands clasped in front of him. "Tell me about this case you're investigating in your spare time. Must be nice, having a job you enjoy so much it's become a hobby."

"Cut back on the small talk Itachi, I'm not one of your business partners. I'm not expecting either of us to enjoy this conversation."

Itachi's eyes immediately hardened, his posture subtly turning defensive.

"I'm not sure I like the sound of that."

"I just want to be clear that I'm not doing this for fun." He paused, weighing the options in his mind before continuing. "Going straight to the point, five years ago my colleague was killed during a certain investigation. One of his leads was connected to Uchiha Corporation."

Itachi's face remained passive, the perfect poker face. Not perfect enough, though, not for someone trained as Gaara was. He noticed the small twitch of recognition in the dark eyes. He didn't bother getting excited though, Baki _had_ contacted Itachi's father at the time, and if he had any sort of interest in his company Itachi was bound to know about it.

"This case, it's not just your run-of-the-mill bad guys versus cops kind of thing. It lies with the international police now, which is why I'm not really supposed to look into it."

"Let me guess, revenge for your colleague?"

Gaara blew a little air out of his nose, in what could be amusement.

"Please, if that was the only reason I'd have given up a long time ago. Try again."

Itachi raised an eyebrow, carefully studying his face, eventually coming to a conclusion.

"It bothers you so much you can't sleep at night, and you know the truth is bad, but you also know you can't live without knowing."

It was now Gaara's turn to raise an eyebrow at the quiet, deep voice telling the answer so surely, as if Itachi suffered from the exact same thing. For a few seconds they stared into each other's eyes, and Gaara couldn't shake off the feeling that there was much, much more to Uchiha Itachi than could be seen.

"Yes" he said. "And now, you might wonder why I haven't contacted you until now. Well, the thing is, it's such an obvious dead end. I don't know if this has anything to do with your father at all, but if it does, he's pretty damn good at getting rid of the evidence."

"My father was good at many things" Itachi mused, leaning a little forward, hands clasping more tightly, "And lying was definitely one of them."

By now, Gaara almost felt sick with anticipation. Could this be it? Could he actually, for once, get somewhere with this? He licked his dry lips, leaning his forearms on the expensive-looking dark blue table cloth.

Of course, before either could continue, the waiter returned with their drinks. Glaring at him Gaara accepted his drink, much too aware of Itachi's gaze never moving from his face.

"Gaara."

His eyes snapped back to the other man at the sound of his name, and he squeezed the glass in his hand, feeling more nervous than he had for a very long time. Feeling more at _all_, he corrected himself.

"I don't know if I can help you, but if I do, it's on one condition."

Gaara nodded, swallowing with some difficulty.

"No matter what happens, you will leave my brother out of this."

Silence stretched out between them for a while, neither moving. It was a very unfair bargain, Gaara thought. He had no idea whether Itachi was saying this merely to hide things from his brother, or if his brother was actually involved and he wanted to let him go free of charge.

"I'll leave him out, to the best of my ability" Gaara answered, wondering if Itachi would accept the careful phrasing.

He felt those sharp eyes bore into him, calculating, and suddenly it wasn't hard at all to believe those statements about Itachi being highly intelligent.

"It'll do, I guess." Itachi leaned back, taking a sip of his water. "He knows nothing, and will continue knowing nothing."

Gaara nodded again, relaxing a little. He just had to be careful not to relax too much in Itachi's presence.

"Then let's get started."

* * *

So! I'm super excited to know what you think! Somehow I like Itachi's and Gaara's interaction more and more every time I write something with them. Oh, and Gaara might be a little ooc, but well, there's a reason for that too. Uuh I feel like there's a bunch of stuff I've forgotten but oh well, I'll just cross my fingers and hope you enjoyed it! Let's prepare for an emotional ride together~


	2. For my brother

I don't know what happened, I wasn't planning to write at all today and I ended up finishing this chapter. But I guess it's all good. Anyway, I forgot to add until now in the previous AN that no character is an OC unless I specifically say so. Yugito is the two-tails, Yurika is some decoding expert from one chapter only, and Baki is that sand guy hanging with the sand siblings all the time. Heh. Itachi's wife though, as you may know from Results, is an OC but on the other hand she's not really taking part in the story.

Well, this chapter we're starting to skim the edges of the plot. I hope you enjoy it, even if it's a little angsty in the beginning...

* * *

**Chapter two: For my brother**

xxx

**-7th September 1996-**

When Itachi heard the doorbell ring, he hadn't bothered checking to see who it was. He was busy studying, he had certain expectations on him after all, and if he wanted to be on top he couldn't afford to slack off. It didn't matter that he easily got perfect scores, knowledge was power, and so he studied things above his year despite being three years ahead already. The unmistakable sound of glass breaking made him pause though, and faintly he could make out his mother's upset voice.

Dropping everything he ran downstairs, headed towards the living room but stopping when he realized his mother's voice was coming from the ball room, as they called it, a large room with ceiling-high windows overlooking the harbor that served as dining room normally.

"You're lying!" his mother shouted, and Itachi ran towards the closed door at the end of the corridor, thinking only something extreme would make his mother raise her voice like that. "There's no way he could have done that! Not with _you_!"

Opening the door a crack Itachi peered inside, tiny pieces of colored glass littering the floor, most likely having made up the vase usually on the dinner table in front of the windows before. His mother stood facing him, and with only his back visible a man stood calmly in front of her.

"Ask him yourself" the man answered, sounding bored. "He should be back soon, or is he working overtime much? Neglecting his precious family, how sad."

"You-" Mikoto started, seemingly at a loss for words, clutching at her heart. "Saying something like that right after-"

She paused, looking straight at Itachi who averted his eyes in shame. Eavesdropping was a terrible thing to do, after all.

"Is everything alright?" he mumbled, glancing up at the intruding man.

"Go stay in your room, Itachi. I'll call you down for dinner later."

He nodded, but hesitated for a moment in the doorway. The man turned a little, looking at him over his shoulder. Itachi couldn't remember much of what he looked like later, trying to forget as best he could about the incident and how he later found his mother hysterically sobbing in his father's arms after Sasuke had come to him complaining about being hungry, but he remembered the cold burning in those eyes, as if swirling they saw straight into his soul.

It was the first time he and Sasuke were allowed to eat take-out food.

**-19th December 1996-**

"But mother, I don't need medicine, I'm not sick!"

Itachi froze outside the kitchen, hoping he'd heard his little brother wrong.

"But if you don't eat them, you'll _get_ sick. Sweetie, I know what's best for you."

"But they taste bad."

Itachi peeked around the corner, seeing his mother stroking Sasuke's dark spiky hair tenderly, her expression as always lately tired and empty. Sasuke was pouting, eyeing a handful of pills with suspicion. Something uncomfortable squeezed Itachi's heart, and suddenly swallowing was very difficult.

"Sasuke" Mikoto said reproachfully, immediately silencing Sasuke and making him take up a pill and place it in his mouth, washing it down with some water.

"What are you giving him?" Itachi asked, stepping inside.

"It's just some vitamins, go to your room and study" his mother answered dismissively. "I'm worried he'll catch a cold."

Not entirely convinced, but desperately wishing he could be, Itachi remained rooted to the spot. His mother had been acting weird lately, his father insisting he was imagining it.

"Can I have one then?" he asked, nervously, not used to making requests or going against his mother's words.

Mikoto was still caressing Sasuke's hair, watching him with a dreamy look, nodding encouragingly at the seven-year-old to keep it up.

"You're stronger than Sasuke, there's no point now for you to take them." She turned around to look at him, the smile not quite reaching past her lips. "You'll be strong for me, won't you, Itachi?"

Confused, brain working on overload with different scenarios speeding through it, Itachi didn't have time to react before Sasuke placed his glass onto the table with a determined look, his little head turning towards their mother for acknowledgment.

"I finished!" he exclaimed, and Itachi's heart sunk deep, deep in his chest.

"That's good" Mikoto said, standing to pick him up. "Let's get you in bed, it's getting late."

Sasuke sent an unsure look towards Itachi, having learnt to read the clock long ago but wondering if maybe he was wrong, and it wasn't only four in the afternoon. It was difficult to tell during winter after all, since most of the time it was the same pitch black darkness outside.

Forcing himself to take even breaths, Itachi smiled reassuringly at Sasuke, getting the usual giddily happy one back, the one that always appeared whenever his little brother saw him. Waiting until they had left he swept his eyes around the area, scanning it for what he knew must be there. If those pills were vitamins, and he hoped they were, he'd never look at dirty pictures again in magazines that his older friends showed him after school.

Eyes zoning in on a pill bottle standing beside the sink he almost stumbled as he ran over to read the label. Dizziness assaulted him, and he forced himself to read the prescription several times before the truth finally hit him.

These weren't vitamins.

Heart pounding he walked in a trance over to the phone hanging on the wall, pressing the numbers with trembling fingers, his father's office number that was only to be used in emergencies.

"Father" he breathed out, interrupting the familiar gruff voice mid-sentence.

"_Itachi? Did something happen?"_

"Yes" he answered, hands clenching the phone tightly. "Mother, she…" His voice caught, and he had to take deep breaths to regain control of it again.

"_Speak up, son, I can't hear you when you're mumbling like that."_

"I think mother did something terrible" he breathed out, feeling shaky, so shaky and he couldn't think what to do, but knowing every second was precious at this point. "She gave Sasuke her pills."

His voice was so low that Fugaku almost couldn't hear him, but the sharp intake of breath on the other end of the line alerted Itachi to the fact that this was, in fact, reality.

"_Itachi, listen to me closely._ _Tell your mother I need to speak with her, that it's urgent, and then you must take Sasuke with you and lock yourself into the bathroom, do you hear me?_"

Itachi choked out an affirmation.

"_And then, you need to make your brother throw them up, all of it, until there's nothing left. I'm calling an ambulance. Now, son_."

Fumbling to place the phone on the counter Itachi bit the inside of his cheek, focusing on the pain. He wasn't a child anymore, hadn't been for a long time, and his brother needed him. No matter what, Sasuke needed him right now.

Taking a deep breath he ran, feeling as if everything around him was so far away, blurred out, the voice of his father echoing in his ears. _Now now now_ he chanted to himself, up the stairs, slamming the door to Sasuke's room open.

"Father wants to speak with you" he panted, not from exhaustion, but from the adrenaline burning in his veins. "He says it's really urgent."

Mikoto nodded, placing a kiss to Sasuke's forehead before standing up from her seat on the edge of the bed.

"Watch over him, Itachi. I want him to have a nice sleep without any nightmares."

He nodded, every fiber in his body on edge, tense, boiling.

"I don't have nightmares" Sasuke mumbled from his position tucked underneath the sheets, only his face visible, hair in a dark Gloria framing it.

Itachi stared at him for a second, his precious brother, looking completely normal. Was this just some sick mistake he'd made? But then Sasuke yawned, and Itachi felt cold dread creep up his spine.

"Sasuke, do you remember the movie we watched a while back? The scary one with the aliens, that I swore you couldn't tell anyone?" he said on a hunch, not wanting to tell Sasuke what was going on, but needing a reason for what he'd make him do.

"I don't have nightmares about it either!" Sasuke insisted, puffing out his cheeks.

"Of course not, but you know, it was a real movie. I didn't want to scare you, but those aliens exist."

"Father says believing in those things is really stupid" Sasuke said with doubt, Itachi moving closer and pulling off the covers, urging him to get out of bed. "And mother said it's time to sleep."

"I know, I know, but the thing is, adults can't see them okay? And they're here, they… remember how they put their babies in peoples' stomachs? They changed your pills for baby alien pills."

Itachi was definitely making up a terribly bad story right now, but thanked whatever deity was out there that Sasuke was still childish enough to believe him, still looked up to him as the perfect big brother who knew everything and always told the truth.

"What?" Sasuke asked in a small, frightened voice, eyes wide and his hands gripping Itachi's shirt tight.

"Don't worry little brother, I'm right here, you'll be okay I promise. We just need to get them out, alright?"

"Hurry Itachi, hurry! I don't want alien babies" Sasuke wailed, on the verge of crying now, sniffling as he ran and stumbled after Itachi on their way to the nearest bathroom. "What do I do?!"

"Shh" Itachi hushed him, watching the stairs worriedly. "Come on, in here."

He ushered Sasuke inside, locking the door behind them with more force than necessary. Taking a deep breath he kneeled, gently pushing a few strands of hair behind Sasuke's ear.

"You need to puke them up, okay? Then they'll go away."

Sasuke nodded, gnawing on his lower lip, hesitantly placing his little hands on the toilet ring and supporting his weight with them as he leaned over it. The sight nearly broke Itachi's heart. This wasn't supposed to happen, wasn't supposed to be real. How do you even begin to formulate the thought in your head, that your own mother, to your own brother, that something like this could happen.

In the end, Sasuke of course couldn't force himself to do it by will alone, so Itachi had to help him. His little brother may think that nightmares were about monsters hiding underneath your bed, or aliens taking over the world, but Itachi knew now that it was definitely possible to live your own, personal nightmare. Living through it while awake, knowing there was no escape, and the only thing you could do was hold on to that small part of yourself that kept calm, that rational part, and Itachi was clinging to it desperately.

He talked calmly, reassuringly, everything was alright, you'll be fine, don't cry Sasuke. His hands were now steady, holding Sasuke's hair back, his breathing slow and automatic. If he just didn't think, just acted in this relaxed-on-the-surface crisis mode, then he could get them through this. And when it was over, they would…

He faltered, feeling his chest squeeze tight again and fighting the feeling. He wasn't a child. Enough naivety had been forced out of him, for him to realize things would never go back to normal. Where there had been a family, a unity, something he'd always thought of as a whole, as a barrier against the world, there was now disruption.

Not a family.

You don't do this in a family, and so they simply couldn't be a family anymore. From now on, there was his father, still very much a reliable father, but not enough to protect them. There was his mother, an unstable element, a cause for worry and pain.

And then there was his brother, the one person in his life that mattered more than anything. His precious person that he needed to protect against the world, and now also against his parents. Because how could he trust his father, that the same thing wouldn't happen to him?

Rubbing Sasuke's back for a long time after he'd finished, he wished, not for the first time in his life, that he was older, smarter, more reliable.

If only the future could come faster.

**-June 18th, 2012-**

"Then let's get started" Gaara said, and Itachi carefully placed his glass back on the table.

Started. Sure. But where? What did he know anyway? _Not enough_ his mind provided him with. _Nowhere near enough._

And what was he supposed to make of this Gaara person, the wrinkled shirt, the obvious authority? At this point though, Itachi almost wished that this stranger would know everything, would lift a burden from his shoulders. Heaven knows he'd been carrying too much for too long.

"Do you know why Baki went to see your father?"

Itachi took a slow breath, letting it out just as slowly. Did he?

"I have my guesses" he replied carefully, not wanting to get into topics that might be unrelated. He still wasn't sure he could trust Gaara, and he needed to know just what the other was getting at before going into details that could potentially ruin his entire life and career.

"You're a careful man, good" Gaara replied, those pale eyes boring into his underneath ridiculously thin eyebrows. "I'm talking about Akatsuki."

Itachi felt the knot in his stomach tighten a little, making itself known, as if he'd forgotten about it during the car ride here. No room left for small talk indeed.

"You think my father was connected to them."

"My colleague thought so, and now he's dead, unfortunately not leaving behind enough of his suspicions to give me any clues as to why."

"Perhaps I need another condition" Itachi said after a few moments of silence, thinking fast. "I'd rather not get punished for my father's possible actions."

"Unless you murdered Baki yourself, I don't really care what you've been involved in. This is in my spare time, as I said, I'll follow whatever rules I want to and let the higher-ups know what I think they need to know."

"Are you sure you're not a gangster in disguise?"

Gaara let a tiny smile ghost over his face, so quick Itachi almost didn't notice.

"I ask myself the same thing at least once a day. Perhaps I am, but in that case I'm a gangster with the officials on my side. Anyway, back to the topic. At the moment, Akatsuki is causing a disturbance in the world, and I'm convinced they started out here. My gut feeling tells me the origin is the key. Judging by your need for a second condition, I'll assume you might know at least something related to them?"

"I might" Itachi said, letting Gaara's words sink in. Glancing around the restaurant he had the uneasy feeling that it would be easy for someone to listen in on their conversation. Maybe going to a public place wasn't a good idea after all.

"Let me put it like this: If I pay for this lunch, am I wasting my time completely?"

Their eyes caught, another silent measuring of each other. They both treaded on thin ice here, not knowing what could be admitted, what level of trust could be there between them. But Itachi was tired, tired of lies, tired of guessing things about his father.

"I want to know the truth about my father" he answered, mirroring Gaara's narrowed eyes. "I don't know much about Akatsuki, but I know they're responsible for things that have happened within my family. Very personal things."

"I'll be discreet" Gaara said, a gleam in his eyes, as if finally hearing good news in a dark world.

"You'll have to be."

"Is that a threat?" Gaara had raised an eyebrow, but didn't seem bothered. "Or is it the third condition?"

"I'm putting a lot on the line here, Gaara. I don't care much for my job, but I'd rather not traumatize my brother if things were to leak."

Nodding, Gaara held out his right hand.

"A deal then" he suggested. "Neither of us will tell anyone else, and in return, we'll tell each other everything."

"Everything that concerns the case" Itachi agreed, causing Gaara to give him a questioning look as they shook hands.

"If you say so" Gaara said, not objecting like Itachi thought he would.

Their food arrived, not that Itachi had much of an appetite.

"I'm paying for this with my hard-earned money, so you'd better eat."

Itachi looked up, Gaara most likely having noticed the doubt in his eyes as he regarded his plate. He sighed, but did as told, wondering how he was going to explain to anyone that asked why he was having lunch with this man, of all people.

"This is the point we can have small talk" Gaara broke the silence with, placing an artfully cooked piece of food in his mouth.

"Oh, yes, how could I miss the perfect opportunity."

"Well, I guess I should apologize for Yugito's comment earlier, she's not the only one too interested in my non-existent love life. She just said it to annoy me."

"Hmm. I don't think anyone would dare to talk to me that way."

"Not even your brother?"

Itachi's lips twitched.

"He's not very happy with me lately. But no, he's not the type that would make jokes like that."

"You're free to hang out with her if you want, she puts a nice perspective to life when you're busy with self-pity."

"Somehow, I'm not sure that sounds like a positive thing."

Gaara shrugged, waiting to reply until he'd finished chewing. Once some of the tension had let up he realized he was actually starving.

"Depends, I guess. I've always found it refreshing."

"Is she more than a friend, then?"

Gaara snorted, looking to the side.

"I'm about as straight as a spiral, so that's a no."

"Like my wife then."

Itachi froze the moment he'd said it, feeling just as surprised as Gaara looked. Damn. How did he even let that slip?! He'd never told anyone, and here he was with a guy he'd known for maybe half an hour, already letting things go to hell. He must be more desperate for someone to talk to than he thought.

"It's… not much of a marriage" he added, losing appetite again.

Gaara didn't say anything for a while, just watched him with too absorbing eyes. Itachi was torn. Part of him wanted to leave, forgetting about the whole deal, maybe go for a trip to some nice secluded place and never return to reality. The other part had decided that Gaara was a very good choice to spill all his secrets to, and he could feel it all bubbling just underneath the surface, as if he'd pulled the plug by accident and caused a chain reaction.

There was a third part as well, the calculating part quickly going through the best ways to silence the red-head before he could cause any damage.

"When I was about twelve," Gaara started, scrutinizing the fork in his hand instead of Itachi, "I was taken in by my uncle. He wasn't a bad person, he just earned his living in a way most people would condemn. He didn't take me in out of pity, or any sense of family bonds. In short, you could say I really am a gangster in disguise. I was just lucky to get out of it in time."

He met Itachi's eyes, and something passed between them in that moment, as if to say, alright, here's something we can use against each other, and now we're bound by that knowledge.

"I really do hope no one else is listening to us" Itachi said, relaxing slightly when Gaara broke eye contact and started eating again as if nothing had happened.

"I won't question your motives for being married to someone who doesn't swing your way, if you don't question my methods."

"I guess I have no choice but to agree to that, do I?"

"And whoever breaks their promise gets to be on top."

It took Itachi a few seconds to understand the meaning behind the phrase, but once he did, he almost grinned. Almost.

"Why do I get the feeling you'll end up on top of that deal no matter who's the deal breaker."

Raising his glass of water in a mock toast, Gaara simply raised an eyebrow and smirked.

* * *

Gaara smirking is probably very ooc, but admit it seems very hot. I know I think so. Anyway, Gaara has already started with the innuendos! How sad that there's so much left before any of them turn into reality... Any thoughts on who should top? Haha jk, it's too early to think of that:p

On an unrelated note, I got a new cat last week, very adorbs. Next chapter we'll get something that might also be adorbs, namely teenage Sasuke!


	3. Shattered world, shattered hearts

I don't know how, but I managed to write a lot. I can't believe 2007 was so long ago, ugh I feel old. I mean, that's when I started high school! Speaking of high school, and the fact that there's a lot of Sasuke in this chapter, in Sweden we have a three year high school and you finish the year you turn 19. Sasuke, however, skipped a lot of grades, as you'll notice.

That said, I bring you a little smex in this chap! Just to start out nicely before the painful stuff... heh. Anyway, damn, this chapter turned out so long and it's only background, but very important background! I hope I didn't reveal too much of the plot already though, that would be sad. After this we'll concentrate on the present for a while, I think.

Anyway, I'm happy there are actually people reading and appreciating this story. It's not exactly full of your OTP's, haha. Well, soon we'll get some Naruto and Sasuke interaction! Ah but at least the brotherly love is strong in this one. Enjoy!

* * *

**Chapter three: Shattered world, shattered hearts**

xxx

**-March 20th 2007-**

There were few occasions when Sasuke enjoyed himself, and so far tonight was not an exception. Sipping on his drink he glumly overlooked the crowd gathered inside the university pub, wondering if this was worth getting that fake ID after all. At this point he didn't care that much about being caught, compared to the waste of money. The classmates that had dragged him there had scattered, gone god knows where, but it didn't really bother him. Sitting alone he was much more free to check out the people he wanted, instead of worrying someone would catch on.

Even though he had the reckless plan of coming out to his father at eighteen a few months from now, he didn't think it would be wise to get caught before that. At eighteen he might at least have a chance to control his own life. He only had one year left of university after that, thankfully only forced to take three years of business school before his father deemed him ready to join his company. What a joyful future, indeed.

"If you're looking to drown your sorrows, this might be the wrong bar for it."

Sasuke glanced to the side, heart skipping a beat at the sight of the highly attractive guy sitting down next to him.

Red sirens went off in his mind.

"I was doing great on my own" he answered, making sure to sound as disinterested and dismissive as possible.

"Oh, yes, I noticed. I'm Neji, by the way."

"Can't remember asking."

The other guy, Neji, leaned back with an elegant eyebrow raised, looking unfazed by his rudeness.

"Figured I'd spare you the trouble. So you're Sasuke, huh? Your friends thought it'd be fun if I tried to chat you up."

"They're not my friends" Sasuke hissed, narrowed eyes glaring daggers in the direction he thought they might be.

"Hm. Well, I wasn't going to pass up the opportunity."

Something fluttered in Sasuke's stomach, and he pushed it down furiously.

"What makes you think I'd be interested?"

Neji smirked, holding his gaze with pale, serious eyes, and fuck fuck fuck Sasuke wanted it. He wanted it bad, and judging by the widening smirk Neji had noticed it. He forced himself to break eye contact, swearing underneath his breath.

"Don't" Sasuke said, nervously fiddling with his glass, only used to being flirted with by girls. "I'm not going home with you."

Putting an elbow on the small round table Neji leaned on it, his long, dark brown hair falling loosely around his face and shoulders, mouth still curled up in that confident smirk.

"We could always go to your place" he suggested, voice like silk caressing Sasuke's eager ears. "I'm flexible."

_Oh god yes, you sure look flexible_ Sasuke thought before he could stop himself. Everything about the guy just had to scream sexy. The handsome face, very kissable lips, defined muscle underneath the tight, simple black dress shirt.

Sasuke was sold, despite the warnings ringing through his head, overtaken by the nervous but hot coil in his stomach at the thought of doing it with another man. Technically, he was not a virgin, but that episode was best buried and forgotten and so he would think of this as his first time.

Not that he was doing this. Of course not.

"I'd feel _terrible_ if you had to go home alone tonight" Neji purred, and Sasuke wondered how the hell it was possible to make the word 'terrible' sound like a pleasurable sin.

His thigh twitched when Neji's hand made contact with it, sliding upwards, leaving a tingling trail of goose bumps in its wake. Oh, he was so screwed wasn't he? Grabbing the hand in a sudden motion when it reached a little too high, Sasuke wet his dry lips and let his eyes dart around the noisy area, checking that none of his classmates were witnessing this. Glancing back at Neji, he had to swallow hard. Despite his inner struggle, he managed to keep his features under control as he cleared his throat.

"Your place" he decided, a trail of arousal rushing through his body when Neji squeezed his thigh before standing up. "As long as you don't think I'm interested in being submissive."

Neji raised both eyebrows at this, giving him an unreadable look, though Sasuke was sure there was some doubt in there. He glared at him.

"Alright, no need to look like an angry cat. Like I said, I'm flexible."

As they made their way to Neji's apartment, Sasuke struggled not to let his nervous anticipation show on the outside, answering to any conversation in a flat voice and short sentences. Probably Neji thought he was a bit of an asshole, no different from what most people thought of him. He couldn't afford to open up, and he was already regretting this. The solution? Drink more.

He accepted Neji's offer to have a drink first, stiffly sitting down next to him on the couch. Sweeping his eyes around the small apartment, he felt incredibly jealous. If only he could live alone, too.

One drink turned into several, and finally Sasuke felt himself relax a bit. The situation didn't feel so bad anymore, thoughts of his father questioning him why he was coming home so late fading to the back of his mind, and he allowed Neji to put an arm around him. He wasn't really paying attention to their conversation, and was only mildly surprised when his glass was taken from his hand and lips found his, a warm hand sneaking underneath his shirt to move up and down in a firm caress.

He didn't have much experience kissing, but quickly caught up to Neji's rhythm, tongues rolling in a slow, sensual motion. When fingers tweaked his nipple he let out a small sound, biting his lips when Neji moved to suck on his neck. What happened to not being interested in taking the more submissive role?! He couldn't bring himself to care though, arms latched around strong shoulders and fingers brushing through long, smooth hair, tugging at it when teeth dug into his skin just hard enough to make him shiver.

Before he knew it they were naked, and everything was perfect. Firm muscle above him, moving against him; hands gliding over his sensitive skin, harsh breathing into his mouth. And pleasure, shooting up his spine, pressing into him, making his back arch and his toes curl. Hungry kisses bruising his lips, fingers digging into sweaty skin, cheeks burning from words whispered into his ears.

He wished it wouldn't end, almost groaning in disappointment just before his body trembled in orgasm, leaving him breathless, nerves tingling in satisfaction long afterwards. Neji wouldn't stop kissing him though, and he responded, tired at first, then eager again, feeling a small smile play over the other's lips.

"You sure know how to drive a guy crazy" Neji mumbled, holding himself up above him, one hand tracing his ribs before gripping his hip tightly. "How about you fall in love with me?"

"I'll never fall in love" Sasuke groaned, head thrown back as his throat was peppered with little kisses.

"You don't sound very convincing" Neji objected into his skin, grinding their groins together, both hard again.

"There's a zero percent chance" Sasuke insisted, grabbing the pillow behind him with one hand, clawing at Neji's back with the other when pleasure assaulted him again. "Attraction, sure, but love…"

He paused, Neji lifting his head to meet his eyes. In a nice world, this kind of position, being intimate with a guy like Neji, and he did seem like a good guy, would make his body react the way he'd read about. A couple butterflies, maybe a blush not just from dirty embarrassment. But no, the only thing he felt when faced with the notion of falling in love was cold gripping at his heart.

So much for all his fantasies of getting a boyfriend in the future. He sighed, looking to the side, wanting the awkward to go away.

"I could try to change your mind" Neji said, and Sasuke felt a part of him panicking.

"You can't" he bit out, gritting his teeth when a hand stroke his cheek. "Finish fucking me and I'll be on my way."

It wasn't that he wanted to act like that, but at this point, there wasn't anything else he could think of. So far in his life, the only thing love meant to him was pain, with the exception of his brother. And well, he couldn't exactly marry his brother, and so he was probably going to have to accept living his life alone.

Unless his father married him off to some girl like he'd done with Itachi, a not so unlikely scenario.

He wasn't scared to love, but to risk losing that love? To risk going against his family for that love… His life was miserable enough as it was, and other people were not to be trusted.

"You sure know how to be a turn-off" Neji said, but continued anyway.

And for a while, Sasuke was thankful to lose himself in no strings attached pleasure.

**-July 23rd 2007-**

Sasuke was scared. He'd tried not to admit it to himself, but standing outside his father's study, it was inevitable that he was downright frightened. Half of him wanted to just forget about the whole thing, avoiding the confrontation. The other part urged him on, had spoken to him ever since that night with Neji he almost didn't dare to remember even when he was alone. It was that voice that made him brave enough to go through with this, telling him that life could be like that, like that night. Life could be pleasure without shame, and now that he'd tasted that pleasure, he thought that maybe, even if he couldn't fall in love and live happy, his father might accept that he wouldn't carry on the Uchiha name the "normal" way.

And this was an issue since Itachi's wife somehow got away from that part of the deal.

Squaring his shoulders and taking a deep breath he knocked on the door, entering after being told to.

"Father" he started hesitantly, then forced himself to speak with more confidence, knowing how much his father hated anything less than complete self-confidence. "There's something I'd like to talk to you about."

Fugaku looked up from the computer screen, something he rarely did when Sasuke was talking to him, and he felt his throat constrict a little. Taking another breath he forced himself to continue.

"It's just that, I know you started looking for a wife for Itachi when he was around eighteen, and I'd like to spare you the trouble, because I don't… I'm not interested in women."

There were a few seconds of silence, during which Sasuke couldn't breathe, staring down at the floor so he wouldn't have to see whatever emotion there was on his father's face. He didn't dare to think, much less hope, straining to hear any sort of sound, anything just to break this terrible tension.

"I was going to tell you tonight at dinner, but you are to be engaged to a Miss Haruno Sakura tomorrow. You'd do well to honor the clan with your participation."

If Sasuke wasn't breathing before, then now he was certainly going to suffocate. His head snapped up, only to let his eyes confirm that his father wasn't joking.

"I won't" he blurted out, hands balling into fists, nails digging painfully into skin.

"It wasn't a question" his father said through gritted teeth, eyes hard. "That part of you that you referred to, it won't cause anything but pain. Forget about it."

Sasuke was speechless, forced to gasp for air several times before finding his voice again. It didn't matter that he should have expected to not be accepted. It didn't matter that he should have known better than to bring it up now, before he was independent.

"That… that _part_? It's not some damn part of me!" He'd raised his voice unconsciously, his entire body high-strung. "It's _me_! It's not something that'll just go away because you say so! I won't-" He stopped as Fugaku stood up, his face twisted into anger, stronger than any Sasuke had ever seen in him, his father usually a very stoic man.

"Following that path will only make you a disappointment to the family! I won't allow it. I've raised you to become respected, to do well in life, and here you are acting like this! It's very ungrateful of you to throw everything I've given you away, for something that will only result in disaster!"

When Sasuke opened his mouth to object Fugaku slammed his hand against the desk, effectively causing him to wince.

"Would you rather be disowned and thrown out on the street?!" his father shouted, and Sasuke felt as if drenched inside a pitch black cloud.

"I would" he said, quietly at first, then shouted it again, "I would! I hate you!" Turning around he opened the door and slammed it shut behind him, then opened it again. "I wish you were dead!" he screamed, voice breaking at the end, tears only held back by stubborn pride to not let his father win.

Even so, he knew he'd lost, knew there was no getting out of this. His fate was sealed, and he cursed into his pillow, hated hated hated, _hated_ his father with desperate passion.

When Itachi came over for his birthday dinner he was still sobbing bitterly in bed, refusing to tell his brother what had happened other than the supposed engagement. Itachi kept stroking his back, soothingly, promising him they'd solve it somehow.

But for the first time in his life, Sasuke didn't believe his brother's words.

**-July 24th 2007-**

When Sasuke was forced to face his future bride, he'd had time to collect himself. He still couldn't handle his feelings though, and so he'd decided not to feel at all. Pretending to be indifferent was something he was very good at, and he had a feeling he'd only get better in the near future. He avoided his father as best he could, refusing to speak with him, which wasn't too difficult seeing as they never really talked anyway. His mother didn't seem to have caught on to the problem, acting her usual opposite-of-excited self as she greeted Saki-whatever's parents.

When the girl in question became visible Sasuke almost let a groan of despair slip. He'd met her a few times, forced to take part in any number of social activities arranged by the top part of society he sadly belonged to.

Wasn't forced marriage a crime nowadays anyway?

Quickly dismissing the thought of taking his family to court, something he was sure he wouldn't survive in more ways than one, he reluctantly greeted the pink-haired girl. He supposed that to a straight guy, or a not straight girl for that matter, she could be considered pretty. To Sasuke however, she was the embodiment of all his problems, and for a split second he almost felt sorry for her. Then she blushed and smiled at him, and he felt his stomach churn.

Whenever he attended one of those dinners or charity events or trips there was always a gathering of girls his age following him around, mostly at a distance but still in a highly annoying way. Sakura, he now remembered her name to be, was one of them. Well lucky her to have influential enough parents to make his parents agree to marry him off to her. He didn't feel much valued other than as a bargaining chip, a way for his father to gain more money, more influence, something to brag about if he did well and ignore if he failed.

"Sasuke?" she asked, apparently having said something while he was busy wallowing in justified misery.

"The less you talk to me the better" he answered, crossing his arms and looking anywhere besides her. "I didn't agree to this."

She immediately huffed, crossing her arms as well.

"Well I didn't ask for it either, isn't it better if we just try to get along? Come on, let's go talk over there."

Not waiting for an answer she grabbed his arm and dragged him over to sit on a couch.

_Sure you didn't ask for it _he thought with disbelief. _But even if you didn't, you'd still do me in a heartbeat if I offered._

Standing a little to the side, Itachi watched his brother's expression of apathy as Sakura pulled him with her. He felt more than a little concerned, and not a little helpless. He'd tried to talk to their father the day before, getting no response. Deciding to try again he approached Fugaku as he went to the restroom, stopping him in the corridor.

"Father, is this really necessary? Sasuke won't benefit from this. I don't think-"

"I had planned to see first whether they would be interested in each other or not, but because of yesterday, this is a sealed deal."

"I don't understand."

Itachi tried to read his father's impassive face, a small flicker of emotion appearing in his dark eyes before being extinguished.

"Sasuke is not in a position where he can make rational decisions for himself. This is better than the alternative. Don't question me, Itachi."

With that, Fugaku walked past him, leaving him to his own confusion. If anything, this strengthened his suspicion that Sasuke hadn't told him everything yesterday, and it hurt to think his brother wouldn't confide in him. What hurt even more was the knowledge that as long as Sasuke lived at home, he was completely under their father's control. Even Itachi didn't feel like he had much say in his own life, despite being twenty-five years old and married already. What was he supposed to do, kidnap Sasuke and leave? No, they should try to solve this with as little drama as possible. It's not as if they were going to get married soon anyway, it shouldn't be too much trouble making some sense of the situation.

**-August/September 2007-**

Had Itachi known what would follow Sasuke's engagement, he really might have grabbed him and made a run for it. It wasn't the engagement that was behind it though, or at least he thought so. Sasuke was, of course, acting like a disaster. Sakura was close to crying nine times out of ten after they spent time together, and Itachi couldn't figure out what she saw in his brother, not when acting like this. The contract they'd made Sasuke sign was not a huge cause for concern in Itachi's mind, even though it stated that Sasuke wasn't allowed to break the deal. He was certain something like that would never be accepted by the authorities. The problem was the publicity that would be caused if it was brought to light that the Uchiha family took part in this sort of thing, causing Itachi to wonder just what was going through his father's mind. If there was one thing Fugaku would rather die than allow, it was bad publicity tarnishing their perfect reputation.

He knew from experience, considering the aftermath of his mother's attempt on Sasuke's life. She'd been sent to go through extensive therapy, Itachi wasn't sure of the reason she'd broken down, but knew she'd never been the same even when she came back supposedly cured. Absolutely no one had been allowed to suspect anything, and even now he wasn't sure Sasuke had realized or even remembered what happened.

He'd tried to bring that aspect up, but Fugaku had other things on his mind. And those things worried Itachi.

Lately, he'd been forced to take up the double amount of work, while his father spent a lot of time locking himself up or disappearing outside the office. At first he thought he just didn't want Itachi to have the energy to bother him about Sasuke's situation, but soon realized that there was something else going on. Fugaku seemed stressed, constantly thinking about something, never telling where he went or what he was doing. He was often speaking on the phone, dropping the conversation or not answering the calls whenever Itachi was around.

The final straw was when he'd called and asked his mother where he was, needing his opinion on an important decision, and she'd gone quiet for so long he almost thought she'd dropped the phone and left. Instead of simply saying she didn't know, she made him promise not to bother his father about it.

Needless to say, when Itachi happened to catch him unawares in the middle of a conversation after a few weeks he took the opportunity to listen in, despite his upbringing telling him it was a horrible thing to do.

"I'm not overreacting, if anything you're the one that should be taking this more seriously" Fugaku said, the sound of a pencil tapping against his desk indicating he was annoyed more than his as always collected voice did. "We've been over this a hundred times. It's not just my reputation at stake here. Yes, of course I'm concerned! You can't bribe people in this country, like you're doing wherever you're conducting that _business_ of yours. Hn, you know what I think about what you're doing."

There was a longer pause, during which Itachi was almost caught when Fugaku's secretary opened the door to the lobby outside his office for a moment before seemingly changing his mind and leaving again.

"You know I've done anything I can think of. You're what?" Fugaku sounded startled, the scraping of his chair against the floor indicating he'd stood up, most likely walking over to the window as he usually did whenever he needed to think about something. "It's too risky. What do you mean _you're already here_?! No. Yes. Don't think I'll cave in this time, we're too old for this for god's sake!"

By now Itachi's brain was itching to know who the other person was, and just what the hell they were talking about.

"You can't be serious" Fugaku said, sounding more tired than ever, as if he'd given up whatever fight they were having. "Fine. Fine, no need to be like that." Another longer pause, then he added a quiet "I know" almost too low for Itachi to catch, and that was the end of the call.

Itachi spent days trying to make sense of that one-sided conversation, writing it down to remember it more easily. Some things seemed to indicate there was something going on on the wrong side of the legal border, and some things sounded more like a lover's quarrel. And that second part was just ridiculous in Itachi's ears. He wouldn't put it past his father to have a mistress, but to have a conversation like that with her? It just didn't work out. No, something was very wrong here, and he wasn't sure he wanted to find out.

The following week Fugaku was even more distracted than before, rarely spending time at home or at the office, claiming he had some trouble with a business associate. If Itachi had been able to he would have followed his father, to see where he went, and especially _who_ he was seeing, but he was simply swamped with work. Considering that, it wasn't strange that he felt irritation surge when his secretary entered his office and insisted he had to accept an unannounced visitor.

The man entering his office appeared rather grim, with narrow eyes, looking rather built underneath a suit that seemed a bit wrong on him. Itachi hardly had time to guess what he could be there for when a police badge was stretched out to him, the man introducing himself.

"I'm Baki, I was looking for your father but it seems he isn't in at the moment?"

Itachi shook his head, quickly collecting himself after the first moment of panic.

"Can I help?"

Baki took a seat, running a hand over his scalp that was strangely enough covered in bandages, though he didn't look hurt.

"I'm not sure, but we'll see. Are you aware of the fact that your father, and this company, was under investigation about sixteen years ago regarding the death of the Secretary of State?"

Itachi shook his head again, unable to mask his surprise this time.

"This is the first time I've heard of it" he said carefully. "He was a friend of my father's, wasn't he?"

Baki grunted, taking a look around the office while Itachi was speaking.

"You tell me. From what I've managed to gather so far, they could have been either friends or enemies."

"My mother knew his wife, at the very least. I remember she was very upset when they died."

Baki was silent for a moment, scrutinizing him, thinking over his next words carefully.

"Would you think your father was capable of killing?" he finally asked.

Itachi's eyes widened for a moment, his body tensing as his fingers curled into his palms. His father, capable of what?

"Are you suspecting my father of, of murder?"

Baki sighed, slumping a little in his seat.

"No, not really. Not at the moment, at least. But tell him he's part of our investigation and that I need to speak with him."

"What investigation?" Itachi demanded as the other man stood up in preparation to leave.

"He should know what I'm talking about. And if he doesn't, I'll brush him up on the details when I see him. I'm not allowed to say much to the people that aren't involved."

With that, he turned around and left without any additional words, leaving a troubled Itachi behind.

xxx

When Fugaku returned home that night Itachi was waiting for him, still a little shaken but determined to clear things up.

"There was a policeman at the office earlier, from some special investigation forces, asking for you."

Fugaku stiffened, glancing up at Itachi where he stood leaning against the doorpost in the hallway.

"Is that so. I hope you told him to leave."

"Were you really a suspect when Minato and Kushina died?"

Abandoning his shoelaces Fugaku straightened up, fixating Itachi with a cool glare.

"What did you say to him?" he asked, narrowing his eyes dangerously when Itachi didn't answer immediately. "Don't play difficult, son. You know how I feel about that."

Itachi crossed his arms, feeling uncomfortable.

"I only told him you and mother knew them, nothing else. But…" he hesitated for a moment, knowing the reaction to his next sentence wouldn't be good. "He asked me if I think you're capable of killing."

They stared at each other for a long moment, both with their jaws set in a similar fashion.

"Are you?" Itachi challenged, his fingertips squeezing into his dress shirt.

"Do you doubt your own father, Itachi?" Fugaku said quietly, voice quivering with restrained anger.

_I doubt _you_, whether you're my father or not_ Itachi thought, but knew he couldn't say that out loud. His father walked over to him, putting a hand on his shoulder, face close enough that he could smell the lingering scent of cigarette smoke.

Fugaku didn't smoke.

"Someone's out to get us, has been ever since back then." He gripped Itachi's shoulder a little firmer before sighing, relaxing slightly. "I didn't want to worry you, alright? I just don't want anything to happen to us. We can't trust _anyone_, do you understand?"

Itachi nodded. Understanding didn't necessarily mean believing, though.

"Good" Fugaku said, letting go of him. "Don't think about it anymore, I'll solve this."

xxx

Itachi did try, he really did. He didn't want to think about anything that could indicate his father was lying to him, because who would want to think about their parent like that? Still, the fact that his mother had been capable of what she'd done, it was hard to turn a blind eye to the reality that anyone, under the right circumstances, could hurt people they cared for. And right now, his father seemed to care a lot more about his reputation, if that was even the true issue here, than his family.

Itachi had taken to staying over at his parents' house, mainly to keep Sasuke company, because even if he was caught up with work he wasn't about to abandon his brother when he needed him. Sasuke spent most nights sleeping in his brother's bed, but he still refused to talk. Itachi didn't know what he was supposed to do, other than simply stick around and hope their father and Sakura's family came to their senses.

Hope didn't do much for him lately though, and while he forced his brother to eat and tried to convince him that failing university just like he'd failed his summer courses wasn't the answer, he often found himself forgetting to take care of himself. Only when his wife called from her home in China, asking if he was still alive, did he realize he hadn't even thought of her lately. _Perhaps I'm getting over my heartbreak by keeping myself busy, _he thought wryly.

The fake calm only lasted a few days though, because one morning when he went downstairs for breakfast, the headline that caught his eyes in the neatly folded morning paper almost made him drop his teacup.

_Policeman shot to death in gang fight_ it read as he unfolded it, hurriedly turning the pages to the article. _Arriving on the scene of a suspected gang fight by the west harbor, it is believed that the group of policemen was caught in the crossfire by accident. One of them died early Wednesday morning from his wounds despite extensive surgery. So far no one has been arrested for the shooting._

Itachi didn't continue reading, only scanned the page for any clue as to who the man was. Once he found it, he had to swallow against the bile rising in his throat. Holding the paper in trembling hands, he tried not to let the just arrived Sasuke see how his heart sank so far he feared he'd never reach it again.

**-September 12th 2007-**

When Sasuke arrived at the hospital, his mouth had forgotten how to form words. After turning the corner in the corridor and he was met with the sight of his mother and brother, pale faces, hollow eyes, his limbs also forgot what movement was. He didn't react even when Itachi came to him, wrapping his arms around him and pulled his stiff body close, only wishing that maybe if he didn't breathe he could faint and wake up and he wouldn't be there.

_Heart attack_ spun through his mind, in a confused jumble of letters, and he thought, _how can someone without a heart even get a heart attack? _He stopped the almost hysterical laughter from bubbling up his throat, instead releasing a choked sob. Why did he even care. He should be happy, should wish his father didn't recover, maybe he was already dead.

When Itachi's hold tightened around him, and he felt a wet cheek pressed against his ear, he realized that probably, that last maybe wasn't a maybe.

He felt empty, empty when a doctor spoke to them, explaining, what was he even explaining. _Nothing they could do. Too late. Was he stressed lately? _To Sasuke, those words were spiteful, mocking his father, telling them he was weak, couldn't even stay with them when he expected so much of them.

And never, never would his father accept him, forgive him, tell him it wasn't wrong to be yourself, that he was good enough. Never would he hear those words take away his pain.

He didn't notice Itachi talking to him, drying his tears, as if he'd cry over that bastard. Didn't notice he was alone with his mother until she took a hold of his arm, manicured nails threatening to break from her grip. He couldn't feel the physical pain anyway.

"Sasuke, how could you let this happen?"

Her voice sounded far away, broken, her face streaked with tears and her eyes burning with emotion, like he'd never seen in her before. Who was this?

"I begged you to stop, but you wouldn't listen, not even to your brother. Causing so much stress for your father, when things were already so bad. Why would you do that?"

At the end, her voice faded into a hoarse whisper, and Sasuke stared at her with an empty expression, empty empty empty, what was she talking about, about him? It was his fault, he knew, of course, had wished for it even. Had lain in bed at night, wishing he and Itachi were somewhere else, wishing his father wasn't there. Something inside him had burnt out now, every part resisting was gone, his father's death the ultimate victory in their argument.

What was the point anymore?

xxx

Confusion.

To Itachi, that was how the following days, weeks, passed. He tried to comfort an inconsolable Sasuke, convince him it wasn't his fault, finding it difficult when he couldn't tell what else might be the cause.

Between handling the company as the new president with an entire board against him, trying to get some sense out of his mother and being pressured by Sakura's parents to keep their deal he found it hard to hold on, only doing it for Sasuke's sake. He didn't give a crap if the company ran straight to hell, but considering the weak economical situation it was in he couldn't afford to leave it to itself, risking not only his own money but Sasuke's as well. And where the hell had their money gone anyway?! So many transactions his father had made that couldn't be explained, making him sick when he thought of possible reasons.

He chose to ignore it. Whatever his father had been doing, he couldn't bother to care right now. He'd be lucky just to get through this. Which was why, he didn't react as much as he might have done under different circumstances when the call came a few days before their father's funeral.

"Yes" he answered, tired because it was late and he still had so much he needed to do.

"Careful" the voice on the other end of the line said, sounding faintly concerned. "I'd rather not hear about another Uchiha dying."

Itachi blinked, not recognizing the man talking to him.

"Who are you?" he asked, sitting back in his office chair and trying to find the strength to concentrate.

"You seem like a smart guy, I'm sure you've noticed not everything is what it seems with your father and his precious company."

Itachi had trouble figuring out what to make of the slightly bitter, but mainly neutral way the man sounded. As if he was trying hard not to make his feelings known.

"You're the person my father has been talking to and meeting up with" he said, heartbeat nervously picking up. "You're the one who got rid of that policeman."

It was a guess on impulse, but the short silence told him he was most likely right.

"Like I said, you seem like a smart guy. If I were you, I wouldn't try to make any other guesses. I'll be leaving you alone, but your father still owes me."

"Our money… I'll assume it went to you?"

The man made an amused sound.

"That money wasn't yours to begin with. But by owe me, I wasn't referring to money."

There was another silence, during which Itachi wondered what kind of person that quiet voice belonged to, someone who could obviously influence Fugaku enough to risk a lot more than a mere reputation.

"Why did he die?" he asked, referring to his father, wondering what the reaction to his question would be.

"I didn't kill him, if that's what you're implying" was the slow, hesitant answer, and Itachi could have sworn for a moment that the voice caught a little at the end. "Try not to overwork yourself" it quickly continued, before a click was heard and his phone went silent.

Itachi decided to catch up on some sleep.

* * *

Aah, who is the mystery man? Any ideas? Doesn't seem like such a bad person though, or?X) Well, I hope you didn't think this chapter was too sad, we've passed the worst part now. Next chapter we'll get into more details with Itachi and Gaara. And what do you think of teenage Sasuke, pretty adorbs huh? He sure changed a lot between this chapter and Results of a shitty day though, poor baby. Until next time~


	4. Sweet talk

Phew, I managed to write so much in such short time! We're getting a much happier chapter this time, so yay! Also, there's smex! With Gaara! And I have a strange feeling that I'm getting into creating weird pairings, but hey as long as they're hot right? Anyway, I feel that the jinchuurikis get too little appreciation in fanfics, so I felt compelled to use them here. It's more fun for me right now to try writing about different characters, I've been feeling a little repetitive with all the Naruto and Sasuke... I guess I'll get back into them soon again.

I had a huge problem trying to think of a name for this chapter, so I just scrolled through my Spotify and thought that actually, Sweet Talk by the Killers fit pretty well. So yeah there you have it.

So yeah, hope you like this chapter!

* * *

**Chapter four: Sweet talk**

xxx

**-June 21st 2012-**

At ten on a Thursday night wasn't the most ideal meeting time according to Itachi, but he had a feeling that the word 'appropriate' didn't hold much meaning to Gaara. Therefore, he opened the door to his apartment at precisely six minutes past ten, letting his secret visitor inside.

"You wouldn't happen to have any coffee?" Gaara asked, skipping anything even remotely close to a hello.

"I'm afraid not, I'm not much of a coffee drinker" Itachi answered, showing him inside.

Gaara looked surprised, and very much out of place in his dark red t-shirt with faded printing as he sat down on the white couch.

"A busy man like you? Must be tough."

"I get by" Itachi said with a small smile, wondering if Gaara had actually worked in that t-shirt, thinking it wasn't unlikely in today's heat. "I could get you some tea, if you'd like?"

Gaara shook his head, slumping a little against the cushions, rubbing his cheek tiredly.

"Let's just try to be effective, I didn't get much sleep last night. So, why don't you tell me what you know?"

Itachi was silent for a while, trying to gather his thoughts. He had a feeling Gaara would pick up on any lies, not that he wanted to lie anyway. He just wasn't sure how personal he wanted to go.

"It all started when Minato and Kushina was in that accident, right?"

"Not necessarily, but go on."

Itachi breathed in, and then paused again before continuing to speak.

"I don't remember much from back then, but I know we spent time with Minato and his family fairly often. I think my mother had known Kushina for a while, I'm not sure. About a year ago I finally got around to look into what had happened."

"And what do you think happened?" Gaara interrupted, hands clasped as he leaned on the coffee table.

"Well, there wasn't much to find out from the media, but I think we were accused of doing some kind of illegal research? Since the research facilities were shut down shortly afterwards."

Gaara nodded, but kept silent.

"Anyway, Minato and Kushina were on their way to meet with my father when they crashed. I guess that didn't look very good, but there were never any charges pressed, though there were a couple of articles talking about whether or not my father had connections to some kind of criminal organization."

Itachi hesitated, feeling uneasy talking about his father like that. Whatever he felt about his father, he was still his father, and these were things he was sure Fugaku had intended to bring with him to the grave. Still, as much as he'd tried to ignore the past the first few years after his death, there were only so many hints and sleepless nights he could ignore.

"I looked into our accounting for those years. There were quite a few things I couldn't make sense of. Of course, that accountant retired long ago and wouldn't talk to me when I asked about it."

"But you did ask?" Gaara sounded a little surprised, probably not expecting Itachi to have done this much.

"I also looked up a few people that worked here with research, since I couldn't find any mentions of witnesses. I couldn't find any of those who had worked directly with it though."

"Well, no one wanted to testify, so that's not exactly strange."

"Yes. I had to be quite demanding to get anything out of them."

Gaara seemed to have trouble keeping calm by now, shoulders tense as he urged Itachi to tell him what he'd found out.

"I think they'd all been threatened to keep quiet, but there was one man who seemed annoyed enough with my father to open up. He made me promise to let him stay anonymous though."

"Well?" Gaara asked, his gaze so intense Itachi felt as if he was trying to burn holes through his head.

"He said they'd been working on something called Project Mangekyo, though he didn't know any details since he was in another department. He just knew a lot of his colleagues were worried about it, and that the new research leader seemed shady. He was upset, saying they only managed to get away with it because Kushina, who apparently worked in that department, was on maternity leave when they changed the direction of the research. So probably, whatever they did wasn't suspicious at first."

"That shady guy was Orochimaru, he's been affirmed to have connections with Akatsuki, though he's dead now. Lucky for your father he wasn't affiliated with them until much later."

Itachi let that information sink in, thankfully already used to the thought of his father dealing with Akatsuki. He wondered how many more confirmations he'd get during the night.

"I think this man was very fond of Kushina, because he seemed to be convinced that my father killed her just to keep her silent. Especially since her husband was so influential. Anyway, from what I could figure out from accounting, large sums went in and out of the company without explanation. I couldn't do much about trying to find out where."

Nodding slowly, Gaara leaned back again, absentmindedly running a hand though his hair. To him, none of this was new, but the fact that Itachi had managed to confirm that project Mangekyo existed was definitely a step forward. Before, all trails had ended with the fact that yes, Orochimaru may have worked for Uchiha Corps, and yes the research was abandoned, but nothing could ever be proven. All clues had been swept away, and in the reports he'd read there was nothing to go on. They hadn't been able to go through their accounting, since the court had decided that the suspicions weren't strong enough for that.

"Thank you, Itachi. This helps a lot" he said, mind already whirring to try and fit more puzzle pieces together.

"I'm not done yet" Itachi said, looking rather uncomfortable. "I know who killed your colleague."

Gaara went dead silent, frozen in his seat. Itachi was just a goldmine of information, wasn't he? He should have talked to him years ago.

"I don't know who he is, and I don't know what his relationship with my father was, but… Before he died, Baki came to see my father at the office. Father had been acting strange for a while, and I'd overheard him talking about trying to solve something, that it wasn't just his reputation at stake. He was very upset when I told him Baki had asked for him, and had also asked me if I thought my father was capable of killing someone."

Itachi paused, taking a few deep breaths. Even though he'd been over this so many times in his head, saying it out loud was difficult.

"Father said they'd been set up, when Minato died I mean. Then Baki died. I didn't want to think it was my father doing it, but then when he died, too, I got a phone call. It was from the person my father had been trying to solve things with. He'd been out of the country, but came back shortly before Baki died, so I asked if he was the one who had killed him, and basically he confirmed it."

Gaara still looked frozen, eyes wide and mouth a thin line. This was so much more than he'd hoped for. This changed _everything_.

"He told me to stay out of it, but eventually I couldn't help myself. Also, after a while I realized that quite a few members of the board were involved somehow. About a year ago I found out there were still transactions going on, since I hired new accountants on my own, something they were definitely angry with me for. Surpisingly." There was a small twist to his mouth towards the end, though he didn't find the situation very humorous at all. "Anyway, that's when they told me about Akatsuki, and that if I valued my life I'd leave them to their business."

"Seems like things are a lot more complicated than I first thought" Gaara mumbled, gnawing on his lower lip. "Perhaps, that man you talked to was Akatsuki's leader. It's interesting, because Akatsuki's sudden appearance coincides with your father taking over Uchiha Corps. My guess, and mind you this is just a guess, is that Akatsuki brought money into the company to help it out of financial trouble."

"And now, we're the ones paying Akatsuki" Itachi said, Gaara staring at him deep in thought.

"Tell me everything you remember from those conversations" Gaara demanded, and with a quiet sigh, Itachi did.

**-June 23rd 2012-**

"So, little brother, how was your day?"

"Don't bother, you know what I did today" Sasuke replied, his voice slightly muffled as it came from the walk-in closet. "And it sucked."

Itachi let out a small noise of confirmation as he made himself comfortable on Sasuke's bed, loosening his tie. He hated having to wear suits on Saturdays.

"I already told you I'm sorry I had to work."

"You fucking bailed on me, that's what you did" Sasuke muttered, exiting his closet wearing only a pair of black jeans. "Red or blue?" he asked, holding up two shirts for Itachi to choose between.

"It's not exactly a jeans place, Sasuke."

Sasuke's eyes narrowed in a glare, then he promptly turned around and disappeared inside the closet again.

"I think I'll go with purple, just to annoy you" he shot back, causing Itachi to shake his head slowly.

"It's not the first time you've gone shopping with Sakura, it can't have been _that_ bad."

Sasuke didn't answer, his silence saying that yes, yes it was that bad, and Itachi was far from forgiven.

"Sometimes I think you make up half your suffering" Itachi mused, leaning back on his hands to stare up at the ceiling.

"Even so," Sasuke insisted, coming out in a dark purple shirt as promised, "the other half is bad enough."

Itachi chuckled, causing Sasuke to roll his eyes. Despite the recent issues with Gaara and the company, he felt like he couldn't _not_ have a positive outlook on life this summer. The reason? Sasuke was starting to act like himself again, and heaven knows it had been a long time since Sasuke could joke about himself. When his brother disappeared into the bathroom he lay back on the bed, feeling more relaxed than he had in a while. He did feel bad about leaving Sasuke with Sakura the whole day, but not more bad than he generally felt about still not having managed to break off their engagement.

Almost five years was starting to feel like a long time.

Thankfully Sasuke had finally accepted his request to go see a therapist, and he hoped this change in his mood was the result. Sure, he might be a little cynical, and used too much sarcasm and swear words, but at least he was starting to express himself again. Seeing Sasuke hurt was his biggest regret in life.

"Alright I'm ready, let's go" Sasuke announced, and Itachi glanced up at him.

"I think…" he trailed off, noticing an interestingly shaped mark at the base of Sasuke's neck. "Is that what I think it is?" he asked with a raised eyebrow.

"It's just a scratch" Sasuke quickly said, unconsciously putting a hand over the obvious hickey.

"Is that what you told Sakura?"

Sasuke glared, but Itachi could see a faint flush over his cheeks before he turned around.

"It's none of your business what I tell her" he snapped, making his way over to the hallway to put on his shoes.

"If you're going to cheat, at least try to be discreet about it" Itachi sighed, following after.

"Just because you're a virgin it doesn't mean I'm fine living my life in celibacy" Sasuke sniffed, jaw stubbornly set.

"I'm not, though I'm not about to discuss my sex life with you, little brother. I wasn't questioning you, I just don't want some kind of scandal happening. I hope you're sure she can be discreet."

"Who?" Sasuke asked, then blinked and quickly caught himself. "Oh, yes, of course. Don't worry so much."

Itachi wasn't worried, not really. He did wonder why Sasuke looked so uncomfortable suddenly, though. Pushing it out of his mind for the time being, he thought that maybe having an affair was Sasuke's way of dealing with things, and the reason he wasn't nearly as apathetic lately. It's not as if Itachi was completely guilt-free either.

"Whatever you say" he ended their discussion with, thankful for small things like Sasuke opening up to him, and to people in general.

He just hoped Sasuke wasn't doing it to deliberately hurt Sakura.

xxx

"What a pathetic old man you are, sitting in a bar all alone and moping like this" Yugito said, sitting down on the padded bench next to Gaara, who didn't react. "Hello, earth to Gaara? Did you finally learn how to sleep while sitting up? Or did you die and become a zombie?"

When he still didn't react she waved her hand in front of his eyes, giving him a worried look.

"Wanna go home with me and have my babies?"

"I didn't know your eyesight was getting so bad you'd mistake me for a girl" Gaara answered drily, still staring into the distance.

"Oh screw you" Yugito retorted, smacking him over the back of his head.

Slowly raising his head again, Gaara narrowed his eyes and gave her a pointed look.

"Again, I'm not a girl."

"Ha. Ha. Look who's really funny tonight."

"You don't look like you came here to talk to a pathetic old man, though" he said, eyeing her low-cut blouse and curled-for-the-occasion hair falling over her shoulders.

"What the hell, I knew you were just ignoring me! And here I worried you were going to drown yourself in sorrow, see if I care next time!"

"On the contrary, I'm celebrating" Gaara calmly stated, taking a sip of his drink.

Yugito crossed her arms and huffed, obviously not believing him.

"It's true" Gaara told her, sweeping his eyes around the combined bar and dance club, thinking maybe he could find that guy he'd noticed on the dance floor again. "I don't look too pathetic, do I?" he added with a small frown.

"How long have you been sitting here?"

"Five minutes, maybe."

"Hmm, it must be your brooding that scares the boys off. Have you tried smiling lately? I heard it makes people look better."

"Why did I even ask" he sighed, leaning back in his seat to look at her. "Where's your girlfriend?"

Yugito made a face, punching his arm lightly.

"I've told you, she's not my girlfriend. And I'm hiding from her."

"Yeah, because this bar is such a great place to hide from her" he smirked, "I'm sure you didn't agree to meet here at all."

"Maybe I _should_ screw you just to make you stop being such a smartass."

"Found you!" a voice yelled, effectively making Yugito twitch.

"Oh, hey babe, I wondered where you were" Yugito answered, ignoring Gaara's raised eyebrow at the 'babe' part.

"Dammit, I told you to stop calling me that! I have a name you know, and it's Fu! As in fuck you let's go dancing!"

"Or the other way around" Gaara added quietly, getting another painful jab in his arm.

"I'll deal with you later" Yugito hissed at him, but he merely raised his glass in a mock toast and watched her get dragged to the dance floor by the much smaller Fu.

They made quite the couple, Yugito trying to look composed which was difficult wearing high heels and stumbling, Fu with her short hair colored minty green happily ignoring her protests.

For a second, he tried imagining Itachi getting dragged a similar way by him, especially the thought of him balancing on heels amusing. Though, from what he'd seen of him, the guy could probably pull off heels easily.

No, he really shouldn't think of Itachi like that. Regardless of Itachi's sexuality, risking to mix feelings into their deal was a big no-no. He hadn't made this break-through only to waste it because of not having gotten laid in too long.

And so, he'd decided to pay a visit to his and Yugito's favorite bar, guessing correctly that there were a lot of good-looking guys there tonight, seeing as it was summer and they had a popular theme night.

"Hello" someone said to his left, having sat down in Yugito's empty seat.

"Hello" he answered, looking the other guy up and down. "You look a little young" he added, though he had to admit the other was definitely easy on the eyes.

"I'm Utakata" the dark-haired man answered, unfazed. "And being young only means I have more stamina, right?"

Gaara blinked, a little startled.

"If you say so."

"What's your name?"

"It's Gaara, but-"

"Hmm, I wouldn't mind saying that name all night long, though I'm not usually much for talking."

Again, Gaara was startled. He stared at Utakata, who seemed completely relaxed as he met his gaze, dark narrow eyes revealing nothing of what he thought. He kind of liked this guy already.

"Still, you look a little young for me. I usually set my limit at seven years of difference."

"Now that sounds like an unnecessary rule" Utakata answered, moving a little closer. "Sounds a bit like discrimination to me. I guess I'll just have to convince you with a kiss."

Gaara opened his mouth to object, but found it occupied by soft lips demanding his participation.

_Oh. Not bad._

Utakata licked along his lower lip, one hand trailing teasingly down his chest, and Gaara sort of forgot what he'd been about to say.

"I'm old enough to be in here, aren't I?" Utakata mumbled into his mouth, pressing another sensual kiss to it, hand sneaking underneath his t-shirt to brush over his lower stomach. "You shouldn't bother yourself with details."

And so, Gaara found himself already on his way home, Utakata accompanying him. If it hadn't been so long since the last time he went home with someone, he might have been a little less easily convinced. As it was, he figured he'd lucked out that the first guy to hit on him had been decent, not to mention comfortably silent during their short trip.

"Nice" was all Utakata said as they entered his apartment, not bothering to look around, instead focusing on Gaara.

"Just give me a moment, the bedroom's over there" Gaara said and pointed before making his way over to the bathroom, regretting gulping down two drinks in ten minutes, one of them right at the bar counter.

When he walked into his bedroom, he found Utakata already rid of his clothing, comfortably sprawled out on the bed, covers now bunched up by the foot of the bed. He smiled a little, hands clasped behind his head, appreciating Gaara's eyes trailing over his body. Then he pushed himself up with one hand, the other beckoning for Gaara to come closer.

It had been a while since he'd gotten seduced like this, and he had to admit he'd missed it a little. He crawled onto the bed, running his hand up Utakata's thigh, liking how the other was lean, but not too scrawny. _Especially_ liking how he was already half hard.

Utakata placed a hand on the side of his neck, brushing his thumb underneath Gaara's ear, biting gently on his earlobe. Wasting no time, he wrapped his hand around Utakata's length, stroking it steadily as he straddled his legs. Putting his free arm around the other's shoulders he hummed as skilled fingers unbuttoned his shirt, nails lightly teasing the skin over his ribs. Utakata nibbled on his throat, and he let his head fall back as it switched to sucking below his chin.

"Too slow" he mumbled, hooded dark eyes rising to watch him through thick eyelashes.

"We hardly just started" Utakata calmly answered, but pushed him down on his back, ripping open the last button on his shirt and bending down over him to circle around a nipple with his tongue.

Gaara combed his fingers through Utakata's shoulder length, softer-than-it-looked hair, groaning in pleasure as the tongue moved lower. When it dipped into his bellybutton he groaned again, louder, Utakata's hands massaging his hips and upper thighs possessively. Soon teeth closed around his clothed erection, causing him to buck his hips up eagerly. Utakata sure knew what he was doing, but Gaara wasn't in the mood for teasing.

Placing his knees underneath Utakata's armpits he pulled him upwards before pushing him over, swiftly rolling over as well to kneel above his chest. Putting two fingers against Utakata's mouth he felt heat spread through his body as they were sucked on, and quickly tried to unbuckle his pants. Hands now gripped his ass, pushing against his crack through the loose material.

"I guess you're not known for your patience" Utakata commented as he helped push pants and briefs down over his hips, holding his waist to steady him as he struggled to get out of them.

"On the contrary," Gaara said, sliding down the other's body to grind their crotches together, "it's one of my strong points."

Utakata raised an eyebrow at this, but soon lost focus as his eyes glazed over instead, hands finding Gaara's hips again to help him move. They were both breathing a little heavier when Gaara paused, leaning to reach a drawer next to the bed, conveniently containing lube and condoms. When he moved to straighten up again, Utakata pulled him into a kiss with an arm around his lower back, forcing him to arch into his chest.

"I think I like you in this position" he said, voice husky as his hands traced Gaara's lower back and ass.

Gaara didn't object, still holding his retrieved items clasped in one hand as it held his weight, free hand caressing Utakata's slim chest. He allowed himself to get lost in the kiss, tongues rolling deliciously wet. When Utakata pried the bottle from his hand he moaned in anticipation, feeling a shudder run down his spine.

It had been way too long since he'd had another person's fingers inside him.

One hand spread his cheeks to let two slick fingers rub between them, entering him together. His breath caught for a second, and he clenched around them as they sank deeper, lowering his hips to connect their groins again. Utakata moved his fingers slowly in and out, in circles, pressing against his insides and quickly pinpointing his prostate. Gaara rocked his hips in sync with them, unable to stop the sounds spilling from his mouth into their kisses. His lower belly tingled hotly, and worried he wouldn't last much longer he removed Utakata's hand and sat up, grabbing the condom and opening it.

Utakata kept quiet but watched him intently, tracing the muscles of his thighs and causing them to twitch slightly. He bit his lip when Gaara rolled the condom onto him, releasing a heavy breath as he smeared more lube over it as well. Figuring Gaara was done preparing him he gripped his hips, urging them upwards into position.

Giving himself a few strokes Gaara reached behind him, finding Utakata's cock and guiding it to slide over his hole a few times. He swallowed thickly, slowly letting it enter him, eyelashes fluttering from the feeling of the thick head spreading him open. He could feel the hands on his hips tightening their hold, carefully pushing him down. Supporting himself against Utakata's thighs instead he sank the whole way down, bending backwards and throwing his head back as well, mouth open in a silent gasp.

Utakata groaned, caressing up Gaara's chest and sides, rolling both his nipples between thumb and index finger. Gaara gasped, panting when Utakata's nails scraped down his back as his hips bucked up to move inside of him. He grinded down to meet them, then raised himself up, feeling empty before being roughly pushed into again, fingers digging into Utakata's thighs painfully hard.

They picked up the pace, going hard, Gaara knowing both his neck and back would hurt the next day due to his position and not caring one bit. Sweet, sweet pleasure was pulsating through his body with every thrust, and he hardly noticed when he landed on his back, Utakata placing one of his legs over a shoulder for better leverage. All he knew was the hazy fog in his mind, body tensing and relaxing as he clawed at the sheets, being filled repeatedly.

It wasn't long before he was struck by orgasm, releasing between their sweaty, moving bodies with an out-drawn moan, Utakata losing rhythm before following after.

"Damn, I knew you'd be good at this" Utakata breathed against his chest before pulling out with a small grimace. "I'm going to need your phone number."

Gaara wiped some sweat from his forehead, glancing up at the other man as he got off the bed to take care of the condom, finding some paper tissues in the drawer. He took the few that were stretched out towards him, lazily wiping semen off his stomach and chest.

"I'm a pretty busy person" he said, throwing the used tissues on the floor. "This is definitely a rare occasion."

Utakata looked annoyed for a second, climbing back into bed to lie down next to him, head propped up by a hand.

"What's your job?"

"Busy."

"Please don't play difficult with me" Utakata frowned, holding him back when he made a movement to get up.

"I'm not looking for a steady thing anyway" Gaara dismissed him with, but laid back down with Utakata's hand flat against the middle of his chest. "Besides, I'd rather not get to know you and find out just how young you are."

Utakata sighed, turning to lie on his stomach, hooking a leg over Gaara's.

"And it doesn't matter that I'm into older men?"

"It doesn't" Gaara insisted, pushing him off to go take a much needed shower, despite feeling too tired.

Even so, Utakata insisted on staying the night, and Gaara couldn't find it in him to kick him out.

* * *

I feel like I made the last scene too sexy, but I couldn't help myself. I mean, Gaara shouldn't have any interests on the side, or should he? Ah well we haven't seen the last of Utakata anyway, I think he's really hot hehe:3 And I just surprisingly realized that Yugito and Fu weren't too bad either, at least I managed to get some shoujo-ai in there! I just hope I can study for my test on Friday, and maybe I can write more soon again:)


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